If you have read my previous posts you’ll have seen one titled “A touchy subject….” so this one may come as abit of a surprise.
Just so you know this is abit of a long post.
This was once a very touchY subject indeed (hence the other blog post title) but that touchy subject seemed to slowly become a slightly less touchy subject, more conversations took place, more emotions became unearthed and another option emerged.
I’ve toyed with writing this blog post for a while now and kept leaving and coming back to it. I finally decided to write it as I’m more open and accepting to what is happening.
I dont think I’ll forget the day that Daniel actually came to me and said let’s do it, let’s try for a baby. This has a little bit of a back story so hold on….
Since having my daughter Poppy from a previous relationship I’ve always struggled with my menstrual cycle, periods didn’t come, lasted longer than they should, came and went within days and was an all over mess. To begin with taking birth control worked just fine but slowly it was as though my body had enough of all the hormones that the birth control put into it. In the end I decided to stop taking birth control altogether and let nature do it’s thing in order to let my body return to “normal”, I stopped taking any form of contraception roughly three years ago.
Inevitably, this didn’t work and I decided to seek professional help to solve my problems. This lead to the Dr prescribing medication in an attempt to stop my periods and a scan to make sure I had no problems with surrounding areas and my liver and kidneys. The scans came back perfect, the medication not so much. It had no effect what so ever.
Whilst this was going on I still was trying to tell myself I didn’t want anymore children and pushing it to the back of my head, eventually this wasn’t working and I broke down one night to Daniel and said I did really want another child and I didn’t know what we supposed to do from here.
I must admit the next few days were abit tense at home, and to say we was walking on egg shells is an understatement.
Dan then asked if we could talk and I thought here it comes he’s going to tell me we need to separate because we both wanted different things, so imagine how shocked I actually was when he told me he’d been thinking and wanted to try for a baby! At first I didn’t believe him and thought he was just saying it to stop me being upset or to basically shut me up and keep me happy. I didn’t believe him for a good few weeks at first.
This is when it actually dawned on me, I’d been on no contraception and we hadn’t been using any other form of protection either for the past 3 years and nothing. No pregnancy scare, no nothing. It was then I started thinking something couldn’t be right.
I went to the Drs and explained everything and that now we was “actively” trying but we hadn’t been preventing it for 3 years and nothing. He agreed the best thing was to go for some tests to see what was happening, or in this case what wasn’t.
I left the Drs not knowing what to think, I was 25 and being told I would have to go for tests with regards to conceiving was not something that ever crossed my mind. To me, at 25 people are looking at starting a family and are in their prime! I shouldn’t be having to do this tests. Especially already having a daughter I didn’t think conceiving would be an issue.
So a few weeks down the line and Daniel had to go an give a semen sample and have it tested before we could progress any further and before I could have any tests myself.
The few weeks wait between him submitting the sample and our first specialist appointment were the longest few weeks of my life. Im not the most patient person as it is anyway so this felt nearly impossible.
Whilst waiting for these results I was advised to start taking folic acid, and tracking my ovulation dates and my cycle, so I downloaded a number of apps on my phone ( 5 actually, the more the better haha). I went out and bought dozens of packets of ovulation testing kits, in case you’ve no idea what these are they look similar to pregnancy tests and work in the same manner except they tell you if you are ovulating, as the time leading up to ovulation is the best time to try conceive. I’ve lost count the amount of tests I pee’d on!
Finally the day arrived and Daniel’s swimmers were 100 % 😀 So now the test’s for me began, I first had to have blood tests done on days 1-3 of my period and again wait for the results to be given at the next specialist appointment.
The results came back and everything was how it should be, whilst this was good news in a way in another it offered no answer as to why we was having problems conceiving. This then led to me being referred for a HSG scan.
An HSG is a special type of x-ray examination of the fallopian tubes and uterus. The entire test takes about 45 minutes, although I don’t think mine took this long. During the procedure, a thin catheter is inserted through the cervix into the uterus, and a special radio-opaque contrast material dye is injected. If there is no blockage, the dye should flow freely through the uterus and fallopian tubes. If the dye is stopped at any point, it may indicate that a tubal blockage is present. In that case, sometimes a laparoscopy or other surgical repair may be required. In many cases, the doctor may recommend moving straight to IVF.
The test for me was uncomfortable and felt like mild contractions, if you’ve had a smear test before it is similar to this but a little more painful, in my opinion anyway.
Again we had to wait for the results to be analysed and wait for the next specialist appointment to hear the results.
The results came back and again everything was how it should be, and again whilst this was good news in a way in another it offered no answer as to why we was having problems conceiving. The Dr then decided to move onto the next step which is fertility treatment.
Once more I had a mix of emotions, whilst I was happy we was progressing and working towards a positive outcome, I was also in a way angry. Angry because I didn’t think I should be having to do this with already having a daughter, angry at myself thinking I must be doing something wrong. Call me selfish but this shouldn’t be happening to me, is all that I could think.
The next step of treatment is to start Letrozole Therapy, which involves a course of fertility tables and ovarian cycle tracking tests. These tests are to be done 3-5 times over a period of 10 days to see if the tablets are working and further blood tests 10 days after the tracking tests.
So there is were we are on our journey to conceive.